Good Guys, Bad Guys

"I seen bad men do good things and I've seen good men do bad things."

Sometimes, the good guys do really bad things. For some reason, they're still good though. I don't know why that is. A bad guy can do as many good things as he wants- had can do good things all day long!- but he will still be a bad guy.

This kind of surfaced this week while I was with my friends. Some of my friends are good kids and some of them are really bad. That's always the way it is. In every group there are "good kids" and "bad kids." It's not like the bad kids are going to bomb my school tomorrow or anything. I'm talking social preditors. I'm talking kids who are really messed up inside.

The hole not made for me.

My world is closing in on me
I'm crushed beneath its weight
I'm stuck
It's over
I can't escape
These walls which box me in
And pinch
And squeeze
Are forcing me
Already oddly shaped
Into a hole which will not fit
A hole not made for me.

The Ashes of my Ex-Life.

I was digging through some old posts and I found this one that never got posted for some reason: 

I'm an obsessive journalist. I write down e v e r y t h i n g that happens to me- as it happens. You can find almost all my important thoughts stuffed into binders and boxes in my room. It's really important for me to build life perspective. I do this by writing down what I feel and then digging it back up again six months later and reading about it.

There are parts of my life that aren't important anymore.

Those parts get edited out.

Every life is a story and every story has parts to it- good parts, bad parts, happy parts, sad parts.
Every person has to live through good times and bad times.
Every person has to cry... every person wants something and is brutally crushed in the process...
Everyone faces disappointments. 

Who Outsmarted Who?

Hahahaha! Watching "The Rescuers Down Under" again.... that movie never gets old. Neither does this scene:D 

"My mental facilities are twice what yours are, ya pea brain!"

"I didn't make it all the way through third grade for nothin'!"

Joy to the World

There is always a place for joyful,

if sometimes solemn,

carols for me in this season.

I find myself exhausted from 

Coldplay, Lopez, and Sliversun. 

Carols are rest for me-

 rest from my boombox, rock and roll,

addicted lifestyle;

because, honestly, hip-hop takes

so much emotional energy!

 

I had a dream the other night that I was standing 

in a beautiful avenue between 

a row of buildings late

one night just before Christmas.

Snow was falling deep around me.

The trees along the avenue were decorated

with lights and an unseen choir was

singing this song:

It was so beautiful I wished I would never 

wake up. But, of course, that couldn't

be helped. Long after the beautiful lights and voices

had faded away, I still held onto the feeling

that buried deep in this season 

there is a gift, made especially for me 

before I could walk or talk, before I knew 

my own name, and long before 

I even existed. 

When I sing Christmas Carols I am most

conscious of that gift. They always

have the amazing ability to transport me 

all the way back to my very first Christmases

before I had yet opened that gift

and it lay there, wrapped in festive paper. 

I'm still opening that gift- the gift of a friendship

that will last me this whole life and beyond. 

This is my friendship with Christ Jesus.

The House

She’s old now, her crippled hands

Rest easy in her lap;

Now shut the eyes which twinkled bright

At every merry laugh.

As barren as the dusty walls

As old as chair and crib

The house where she was given birth

The house in which she lives.

The rocking chair she sits in now

Is where she used to nurse.

The tiny crib where she did lay

Her children, she used first.

Luke 2

In the same region there were Shepherds 

out in the field, 

keeping watch over their flock by night.

and an angel of the LORD appeared to them,

and the glory of the Lord shone around them, 

and they were filled with great fear.

And the angel said to them, "Fear not, for behold, 

I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all 

the people.

For unto you is born this day in the City of David 

a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.

And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby

wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger."

And suddenly there was with the Angel a multitude 

of the heavenly host, praising God and saying,

"Glory to God in the highest,

and on earth peace among those with whom He is pleased!" -Luke 2:8-14

Merry Christmas